Conan Throwbrien welcomes its host to the stage with discordant jazz and uncanny colour bars glitches. It feels eerie. Desperate. A crushing inevitability. Four joke topics appear at the bottom of the screen. Ridiculous celebrity kids names. Action figures for news anchors. Diet water sales boom. You cautiously slide that last one over to the microphone. Throwbrien emits a string of chirps, like a flame-crested lyre bird with a wounded voicebox trying to mimic human language. “Have you folks heard about this one…”
There is an implied terror in this seemingly friendly opener. What if they have heard this one? What will Throwbrien do then?