The Hitman and L.A Noire Goat Simulator 3 DLC That Never Happened

There isn’t another game series more loaded with pop culture references than Goat Simulator. Pilgor, the crazy, ragdoll-tossed, licking protagonist of the series has been getting up to endlessly stupid hijinks for 10 years, and what started as a daft premise built from a game jam idea has now spawned a decade of insanity, spoofing almost every major video game along the way such as Skyrim, Dead Island and even P.T.

But not every crazy Goat Simulator idea makes the cut, and concepts based on the Hitman series and L.A. Noire never made it past early development. We spoke to developers Coffee Stain North about how these ideas came about and why they never made it to the finish line.

We have one rule. It [needs] a goat. Everything else is open. “We started with very broad themes for all of the [game] jams.” explains lead producer, Sebastian Zethraeus. “[The themes were] Under the Sea, Mythology, and Dev’s Choice, which is what turned into the Hitman one.”

Since Goat Simulators’ inception in 2014, Coffee Stain Studios has regularly run game jams with their teams and these small, freeform creation events give developers the freedom to create any idea, despite how ludicrous, from scratch.

“We have one rule.” shares art director, William Birgersson. “It [needs] a goat. Everything else is open.”

To come up with DLC for Goat Simulator 3, Coffee Stain North let its staff run wild, which resulted in ideas not only inspired by other popular games like Hitman and L.A. Noire, but allowed the associated genres to dictate the gameplay.

“What can we do that breaks the mould?” says Birgersson. “What if we place Pilgor in a single-player, noir detective story? How do we implement the Goat Simulator jankiness and weirdness? How do we make it not too silly, but also very silly? It’s a super weird balancing [act] you have to do. How can we make this special? That’s where we found the key is changing the gameplay essentially.”

Most references from Goat Simulator 3 are visual jokes and tend not to stray too far from the run, jump, lick and headbutt gameplay. But for the DLC, Coffee Stain North was looking for an idea that not only referenced a popular series but also significantly altered the gameplay, and the game jams allowed them to go crazy with those concepts.

I loved the Hitman idea. I want it to become a full game so much. “It’s super low effort [when you only make] something for a week.” says Zethraeus. “You can go all the way with a very, very implausible theme and if it’s thrown away, that’s not an issue. Before we showed [IGN] we didn’t think [the ideas] would amount to anything, and that’s okay because that’s part of the creative process. Finding what sticks.”

One of those discard ideas was ‘Goat55’, which was based on IO’s much-loved assassin series Hitman. During its development Coffee Stain ran with the concept of implementing Hitman’s social stealth mechanics in the world of Pilgor, allowing players to kill, hide bodies, change outfits and infiltrate to reach their target. It was Hitman for all intents and purposes, but with a goat instead of a bald assassin. And in classic, whacky Goat Simulator fashion, there was also a reference to another great of the stealth genre, with a familiar-looking cardboard box triggering a giant Metal Gear Rex to rise from the sea.

“I had forgotten all about that!” exclaims Birgersson. “The social stealth part of Hitman was [what] enticed us, but Metal Gear Solid’s stealth would be awesome as well. An actual stealth experience with goats… That would be pretty great.”

Coffee Stain North tried out a handful of different gameplay ideas during the game jam and another popular stand-out was Detective Pilgor, a murder-mystery detective story that bared more than a striking resemblance to Rockstar Game’s 2011 hit, L.A. Noire.

“Writing a who-done-it mystery story was super, super fun. We [even] did an entire interrogation sequence where you could actually doubt.” shares Birgersson, referencing L.A. Noire’s lauded interrogation scenes, which infamously often resulted in the characters pulling insane-looking facial expressions. ”I don’t think it made it in but the idea was to go for [those] facial expressions. Like their eyes sticking out, mouths opening up. Yeah, we could have had a lot of fun with that thing.”

“I want to make Detective Pilgor so bad,” Birgersson continues. “A story mode is something that we’ve always talked about [for Goat Simulator] and we would like to try it out. Having one be the main part of the game is super interesting I think.”

Surprisingly, Goat55 and Detective Pilgor look surprisingly complete, despite them being very much unfinished following the small amount of time they were in production. Additionally, there was also a rhythm game that made it a reasonable distance during the game jam, as well as a familiar-looking mythology idea.

After learning about all these amazing ideas it was time to address the elephant (or goat?) in the room: Why did they never get completed?

“We found something better.” admits Zethraeus. “We found something that was even more enticing I think. I loved the hitman idea. I want it to become a full game so much, but when you try to finalize a product and make it into a complete package somewhere along the line, we tend to go a bit big.”

It’s going to be super interesting to see the audience’s reaction to this. “It’s always that balancing between what’s fun for the player and how much content the player wants (or needs) for this to be fun.” continues Birgersson. “It’s going to be super interesting to see the audience’s reaction to this and what they’re interested in.”

Coffee Stain North was quick to state that nothing is definitive though, and should there be enough player demand, perhaps one day it would revisit these ideas. One thing is for certain though, the Goat Simulator series has been built on the foundation of game jams and the opportunity for improvisation they provide.

“Essentially all the best ideas are stupid ideas that someone comes up with on the spot.” laughs Birgersson. “It’s such a perfect game for ideas to come alive. I wouldn’t dream about making a rhythm-based dance game with goats, but trying that was super fun.”

Since 2014 Coffee Stain has been putting Pilgor in increasingly crazy scenarios and that’s not slowing down anytime soon. And in such a po-faced industry, a decade of successful, silly goat games isn’t anything anyone expected, including the developers.

“Dedicating my life to goats wasn’t something I was prepared for.” admits Birgersson. “My mother asks me weekly if it’s still relevant? And I’m like, ‘yeah’.”

“There’s so much variety in it, so much creativity, and it’s just a framework.” says Zethraeus. “You have the same base – everyone’s love for goats and what the goats will do when released on society and you can go crazy with it. That’s what’s so beautiful about it. It’s so creative we can do whatever we want.”

Dale Driver is IGN’s Executive Producer of Video Programming and kindly requested Coffee Stain North seriously consider a Metal Gear Solid Goat Simulator parody. You’re welcome. Follow him on Twitter.

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